fallen

when you grow up in the circles that i have, you become fluent in a second language. it is not recognized as a language universally although you can find people all over the world that speak it. there are books written in this language, entire communities based on the language, and it is taught in recognized colleges and universities around the world. Since it has not been officially labeled, many outside of these circles are only slightly, if at all, aware of its existence. They use words like propitiation, salvation, redemption, sanctification, and justification just to name a few. And while they can be found in dictionaries, their use is very particular on the lips of the religious communities.

well along with words, there are sayings. one of which is "i really feel my fallen nature". or something along those lines. now, what is being referred to when they say "fallen nature" has been discussed in books upon books through the centuries. i am not attempting to tackle that right now by any means. but in case, there are some reading that are unfamiliar with it's use, let me put it as simple and plainly as i can.

there is a reason that it seems we should protest war in favor of peace. it is natural, although often taken to extremes, that we want to protect animals. it is right that we seek the rights of our fellow human beings. and the list goes on. there was a time, and there will be again, when the world was in a perfect state. peace. love. equality among men. there was no war. we looked after the animals. and love permeated our culture. that was all lost. and hopefully i can get into that at a later date. but once it was lost, we now live in a world that longs to be back in that perfect condition. until then, we refer to what we live in now as a "fallen state". fallen from perfection.

most of the time when the people in the circles i have known so closely use the phrase above, it is in reference to their sin. (again, another term that requires lengthy study and explanation that i don't wish to go into. but basically, everything we do now, since we are no longer perfect, that displeases a Holy God.) so generally they are using it when they mess up. do something they wish they hadn't or know they shouldn't have.

i've been trying to steer clear of this terminology lately. needing a breath of fresh air and a healthy dose of reality that uses words every person knows no matter what circles they have known. but this morning, as i lay in bed still convincing myself i had the strength to face the day, the thought occurred to me, "this is my fallen nature". but it wasn't in the traditional sense of the phrase or its meaning. although there are plenty of mistakes i wish undone, it was the pain in my heart that was causing my entire body to coil in anguish that reminded me, and made me long again for perfection. hurt is not a state of being, not an emotion, that we are supposed to feel. and one day, we won't. today, i long for that day.

until next time.